Movie Monday II Black X-Mas Remake Edition
First let me just say I went into this movie hoping for the best because the original was a slasher classic and helped revolutionise slasher films in general. With this remake however I was at the very least utterly disappointed. The cover of the DVD has a quote that states, “One of the best horror movies of the year.” 2006 must have been a really bad year for horror movies if this is the best one of the bunch.
Story:
Billy Lenz was born into an extremely poor family where he was abused and forced to live in the attic due to having yellow skin from a rare liver disease. Billy’s mother wanted another child but with her husband she had no luck so she forced herself upon a young Billy. Billy continued living in the attic away from his new sister/daughter Agnes and mother and stepfather until one Christmas he just snaps and kills his mother and stepfather and horribly disfigures Agnes. Billy is placed in a mental institution where every Christmas would pass he would attempt to escape to get back to his former home. One Christmas he has success and returns to his home but it’s no longer his home it has been turned into a local sorority house. One by one Billy and Agnes pick off all of the sorority sisters until there is only 1 that survives in the end.
Casting:
The casting in the movie was sub par at best. All of the sorority sisters are barely likable. Theres the alcoholic, the bitch the other bitch, and the house mother which is really the only half way likable one that you hope survives. The lack of interesting characters almost makes you wish that there is no survivors in the end and the slashers actually win. The part of Agnes is perfect if your looking for a disfigured woman I say this because she looks exactly like a man. And Billy well what can I say about a yellow man who doesn’t have any lines in the movie.
Visual Effects:
All of the special effects in the movie look extremely cheesy and fake. One of the big parts of the movie is that the killer takes the eyes of his or her victim but this isn’t very dramatic because the eye effects look like they were bought at a local novelty shop for $5. I will however say that the last death when a guy gets implaled by a Christmas tree was pretty good and funny at the same time because you just have to wonder how do you get impaled by a tree.
Score:
1 Icicle to the head out of 5
By the way I’d rather watch the movie this guys making than Black Christmas Remake again.
